I just saw the best movie ever. When I say “best” I don’t actually mean that. Or do I?
“Iron Sky” is the cinematic feast about which I speak. It’s probably actually the worst movie ever made. But when movies get so bad, it’s hard to tell if they might not actually be the best. You know how confusing that can get.
So here’s the plot …
A bunch of Nazis managed to escape earth and settle on the dark side of the moon at the end of World War II. Ever since then, they have been planning an invasion of earth. However, the US President is a Sarah Palin-like ditz who, in a desperate campaign move to get reelected, sends a famous black male model to the moon, but of course he ends up getting captured by Nazis. They forcefully change his skin color somehow to make him look more Aryan (which he hates and obviously says a lot of funny, racist stuff about). Also, despite their ridiculously advanced steampunk technology, the Nazis are amazed at the astronaut’s cell phone which they then utilize to put the finishing touches on gigantic war machine. However, the phone runs out of batteries, so they risk sending a detachment down to earth to retrieve more cell phones. Two Nazis (a guy named Adler and his genetically compatible fiancee) along with the captured Aryanized male model go down to earth in a Nazi flying saucer and eventually gain control of the US government by helping the President with her election campaign using traditional Nazi propaganda techniques.
In the meantime, the poor Aryanized male model has escaped and is living like a homeless bum, preaching on street corners about the dangers of the “Moon Nazis,” but no one listens to him. The President’s opportunistic female campaign director falls in love with Adler who ultimately dumps her in his move to become the new Fuhrer and lead the final invasion of earth himself. The Nazis commence a “meteorblitzkrieg” with space zeppelins towing asteroids down to earth. The President counts all of this a blessing, since all Presidents who started a war in their first term always got reelected. The President then unveils a secret battle spaceship called the USS George W. Bush loaded with nukes to take on these Lunar National Socialists. In the end, the moon pretty much gets blown up and all the countries in the world start launching ICBMs at each other.
So, as you can see, best movie ever. I won’t blame you if you hate it because it’s actually pretty bad. But pretty dang awesome.